You may be forgiven for thinking that the title of Secret Admirer Slot from Microgaming is a wee bit sinister, but like the Secret Admirer you’re thinking of you’re actually barking up the wrong tree. This particular Secret Admirer is the type you had in junior school (hopefully you’re not still barking up the same tree) – the type to buy you a Valentine’s Day card and not sign it because he or she is too shy and lovely. Awwwww.

Gameplay

He or she may be too shy and lovely to come out and confess their love for you, but they’re obviously not too shy to put on some freaky funk music that you might have seen in a 70s porno movie. Not that you or I have seen any. Fortunately the rest of the symbols across the five reels rescue the music – the two together can only have good intentions. Our symbols are Hearts, Jewellery, Diamonds, Roses. If they are the machinations of a pervert at least he can afford the good stuff.

And we may well be rewarded. The game plays across 9 paylines. Obviously it’s up to us how far we go, but you’ll be pleased to know that the reels spin quickly to achieve their climax. You’ll also be pleased to know that this Secret Admirer pays out for almost anything – most paylines payout for only two symbols along a winning payline, while some of the game’s High Symbols pay out for a single symbol.

The game’s Wild symbol is a well-fitted but kinky Mask – more masquerade ball than gimp, though, before you begin to worry. We’re safe in the realms of Richard Curtis rather than Robert Rodriguez. The Wild Mask substitutes for all other symbols, just as a Wild Kinky Mask substitutes for all other obligations, such as work, vacuuming or cleaning the bathroom. As in life itself, a well-placed kinky Mask ca get us all sorts of exciting places.

Bonuses

We all know diamonds are a girl’s best friend, so if you’re stalking her you can legitimise it by a gift of a Tiffany diamond necklace. Let’s not mention the bonus game you’ll be after if you do buy a loved one a Tiffany diamond necklace, but the bonus game on offer her when we land three or more Diamond Ring Scatters (Ring!…You know what that means!) is worth 3 Free Spins during which all Scatter wins are held, and recurring Scatters can re-trigger the Free Spins round.

The game’s Gamble feature – available to us whenever we win on any argument…I mean payline – is superbly styled in keeping with the game. Flip a roses-covered card and guess the correct colour to win double our win or the correct suit to collect quadruple or original win.

Summary

I know what you’re thinking – only 3 Free Spins! But this Secret Admirer Slot has already lavished diamonds upon us, and played correctly it can give us precisely the game that a slots player needs. If you catch my drift.